Leeeeeeavin’ on a Jetplane…

June 22, 2009 at 11:54 am | Posted in Baby Weight (Evan), I's for reals, The Others | 1 Comment

… and now I’m finally back again.

We’re back.  We’ve been back.  And you, my pretties, have been the last to know about it.  I sorry.  I CAN HAZ ACCEPTED APPOLOGY?

Evan and I left for Arizona last Saturday.  After a teary daddy dropped us off, Evan was stuffed into a Baby Bjorn and I flopped a backpack onto my back.  I lugged the suitcase behind me and we went to ticketing to check in.  Evan’s boarding pass read, “MCNAMARA, INFANT”.  Went we got to the awesome TSA dude, he looked at it and said, “Wow, a lot of mother’s are naming their babies, ‘infant’ lately.”  *snort*

We got through security smoothly and headed to our gate.  I stopped at a coffee shop and asked for a bottle of water and a large cup of hot water.  At our gate, I mixed a bottle for Evan and a bottle of cold water for later.  Then I poured the rest of the hot water in with the cold water and whatdoyaget??  WARM WATER.  I’s a genius.  (okok, BCUCFO Teresa, gave me the tip)

Evan was uninterested in the bottle.  “Eat?”, he said “EAT?  Look at all these PEOPLE!  Look SHINY over there!  I wanna touch THAT!  AAAAAHHH!  WINDOWS!  You didn’t say there would be WINDOWS!  Getthatstupidbottleouttamahface!

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So we spent the time waiting to board looking out the window and scratching at shiny things.  Before the plane boarded I made a quick run to change Evan’s diaper.  Then I went back to the gate and then “!!!!” shit, I forgot to pee myself, so I ran back to the bathroom and peed with Evan still in the Baby Bjorn.  (Sorry Evan for your wee little complex I’m creating for you.)

Back at the gate, I stood in front of the line and reached for our boarding passes.  And then checked my pocket for the boarding passes and then asked Evan where I put the boarding passes.  About 5 minutes later I ran up to the bored looking gate agent and said something like, “BOARDING PASSES!  OMG!  I’m not a terrorist with a baby!  I need to BOARDING PASSES!”  And he rolled his eyes and printed me new ones.  Whew. 

Our seats where in the last row in the aisle.   It wasn’t a terrible flight.  I know, right?  Sure there were throwing of toys / squirming of babies / bottles refused / naps fought / getting bored of mommy.  But there were also no ear issues / pleasant and even helpful neighbors / constant stream of people standing next to us (for the bathroom) that Evan could flirt with. 

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Arizona was wonderful.  It was great to see my Grandmother and Uncle. 

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  I ended up buying (or rather my Grandmother ended up buying), a pack ‘n’ play while we were there because of my grandma’s tile floors and my fear of co-sleeping.  It worked out pretty well. 

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I was also very happy with the car seat that was borrowed.  It was installed perfectly.

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For the flight back, we got a delayed plane.  Err.  Once we got on, I had a window seat this time and as I was stuffing all the toys and diaper packs and bottles… Evan saw BOTTLES and he WANTED A BOTTLE RIGHT THIS MINUTE!  So he screamed.  I stuffed it in his mouth and he finished as we were taxiing to the runway.  When it was gone he tried to fall asleep and couldn’t, so he screamed.  The lady next to me laid head down and covered her ears.  Oy.  Thankfully, a couple minutes later he fell sleep for 2 and half hours!  HALLELUJAH!  When he woke we played for a little while until the plane started to land.  And, what is this?  My ears start hurting.  And Evan starts crying… cause his ears are hurting too.  He wouldn’t take his water bottle so I broke out the emergency distracter/swallow starter.  A BLOW POP*. 

 *Disclaimer:  I don’t give my nine month old candy.  Don’t look at me like that.  He was hurting and annoying the fuck out of everyone.  Hurt+Annoying=Candy.  Did you not know that?

It totally did the trick.  I whipped it out and he stared at it, silent.  And I took a lick and he took and lick and SWALLOWED.  So we shared the lollipop.  And he was happy.  Sweet Success.  (See what I did there?)

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  On an extremely sad aside: my Grandmother went into the hospital shortly after we left.  She’s still there and hardly able to breathe.  (She has COPD and smokes.)   (Community Message: Srsly, STOP SMOKING NOW).  I hate that there is nothing I can do for her. 

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  1. […] see my Grandmother on her birthday (April 30th).  I don’t know if I can bring Evan or not.  He was a handful at 9 months by myself.  I can’t imagine another 10 months added on that.  That’s like 10 months of pounds […]


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